London, Street lights and.. an angel. (Final Episode)

And with a progress of time, I noticed something that had changed a bit. I didn’t know what it was until one day.

Part VI:


We were walking back home from a hectic schedule of ‘eating at McDonald’s’ she all of a sudden stopped in the middle of the road and began hurriedly searching her bag.

‘Did I take my purse from the McDonald’s counter?’, she blurted and continuing to search.

‘Yes you did’, I said.

She didn’t stop searching until she got her purse out of her ever crowded college bag, ‘Here it is, thank God’, she finally said.

‘My word, you gave me a fright Eva’, I laughed.

She had turned pale when she was searching for it and she was sweating badly. That was when I realised. The difference I noted in her was this. She was more serious about making sure she didn’t miss anything.

The number of times she was worried about the door being locked, the bus she was on, the change she got at the counter, all those cheeky things was lot, lot more than she was doing initially. The slightly serious part was that she was, nowadays, getting a more agitated while doing this.

And another day something even more scary happened. That was a weekend shopping trip to the Westfield shopping centre, the largest shopping centre in Europe. Walking across all the wonderful shops like NEXT, Debenhams, Marks & Spencer and my personal favourite HMV was one heaven of an experience.

I didn’t notice much of problems in her till about a couple of hours shopping. And when we were walking through the sections of Marks and Spencer, she pulled me by my shirt sleeve and showed me something.

‘I think the baby is going to fall from the pram’, she said.

It took me a few seconds to realise where she was pointing to and what she was telling me.

‘I don’t think so, the baby’s dad is just near the pram’, I said.

‘Will the baby fall down?’, she asked again.

‘No, why do you ask? I.. don’t seem to understand’, I said, slightly concerned.

‘I am just scared and I keep repeatedly thinking that the baby is gonna get fall down and get hurt’

‘Hey, hey, hey.. look who is talking like a baby now’, I laughed trying to tease her.

‘Oh no..! The baby is going to fall..! Please will you help the baby?’, she exclaimed. The problem was that she exclaimed at the top of her voice and the whole store was stunned for a second.

That really caught me off guard and the whole shop turned to look at her. Everything seemed bizarre and I didn’t understand what was happening.

‘You didn’t believe me, did you?’, she asked in a hopeless tone.

‘I think we should leave’, I said.

‘You didn’t believe me, Pete’, she said and started to walk away.

It took me quite a while to apologise to her. All part of love, I smiled to myself. But, something was seriously, seriously was not right.

That night I could not sleep that well. I was concerned about Eva. I wanted to make sure that she was alright. There seemed to be something wrong but I did not have a logical explanation about it. I thought it was my stress at work making me imagining things.

I was so carried away with my thoughts at around two o’clock at night when my phone scared the devil out of me.




Part VII:

The phone rang so loud that my cousin almost fell from her bed in the other room. By the time I dug around my things to find my phone, both of us were wide awake.

It was two in the morning and I was half expecting Evangeline to call me. Immediately, I could feel there was a problem.

‘Eva..?’

‘Pete, I think there is someone trying to break into my house’, she whispered in a horrified tone.

‘What?!!’

‘Pete..! some one is there in my garden trying to climb up’, she was in tears on the other end.

‘Hey come on, it could be someone shifting into their new house Eva’, I was kidding.

‘Peter..!! Please..!!! Please...!!! HELP ME..!!!’, I could literally hear her from her house and in a reflex I burst out of my house and ran to her house. I didn’t even wait for her to open the door. I jumped over the fence and ran into her garden. There was no one there.

‘Eva, take a breath. I am in your garden. There is no one. CALM DOWN will you..!!’, I shouted.

‘Peter.. Please..’, she was crying out loud.

‘Open the door Eva, I am coming in’

‘Pete.. Please help me..!’, she shouted in tears.

‘Eva, open the door, NOW!!!’, I commanded into the phone.

My god..! It was totally difficult for us to calm her down. It was almost four o’clock by the time she was asleep. We couldn’t leave her alone. My cousin agreed to stay with her till the morning. The way things were going, I was sure something was wrong.

Having not slept properly the whole night, I called up for a day off. My cousin came back at half past nine and prepared breakfast. Both of us were seriously concerned about what was going on. She handed over a cup of coffee and sat down to talk. Both of us were quiet for a few minutes.

‘Is there a problem Pete?’, she started.




Part VIII:

I took a few seconds. ‘Honestly, I am not sure’, I said.

‘We need to find out. Tell me what is going on?’, she insisted.

‘Just a few trivial changes’, I blurted.

‘Tell me what is going on and let me decide if they are trivial’, she strongly said.

Hesitantly, I started with the changes that I had been noticing over the last few days. I didn’t know if I was correlating some uncorrelated events. But, I felt better that I could get things clarified.

She was silent for more than ten minutes after I had finished. I didn’t know what she was thinking. After the cup of coffee she started with a logical medical explanation of what is happening.

‘Have you heard of OCD?’, she asked.

‘Heard of what?’, I said.

‘It’s called Obsessive Compulsive Disorder in the medical terms’, she said.

‘Medicine and I don’t go so well. Explain it to me in a stupid and easy way’, I said.

She opened up her laptop and showed me a few basic links of OCD.

http://hcd2.bupa.co.uk/fact_sheets/html/obsessive_compulsive.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive-compulsive_disorder

http://counsellingresource.com/distress/anxiety-disorders/obsessive-compulsive.html

‘OCD starts with little doubts about your daily activities. Then the anxiety grows day by day and it gets to other serious anxiety disorders. And if not treated at the right time, you never know what it would lead to…’, the words hung in the air.

It was difficult for me to comprehend what she way saying but I could see this was a much more serious problem than what I was thinking.

‘What would that lead to?’, I asked.

‘OCD can make people paranoid and psychotic’, she said.

‘What do you mean by psychotic?’, I asked.

‘It is a generic psychiatric term. Something like "loss of contact with reality".’

‘What?’

‘People experiencing psychosis may report hallucinations or delusional beliefs, and may exhibit personality changes and disorganized thinking’, she read out loud.

‘Do you, in the name of God, mean she is crazy?’, I shouted.

‘Cool down Peter..! I am not saying that..! Take her to a doctor before anything serious happens..! I am just trying to say that..!’

I was trying to digest what I was hearing. I was getting more emotional every second and getting even more confused.

‘Help her Peter..!’, she said

I turned and looked at her.

‘She needs your help at this point than any time in her entire life’

I fell silent again trying to agree with all these.

She gave me a gentle punch on my back and said, ‘It still seems to be in an early stage, so there is nothing to worry’

For the next few days, we made sure Evangeline was not left alone. We took turns to keep her company. We did all we could to keep her feel safe and happy while something could be sorted out.

While on the phone with my best friend in India, I learnt about one of the Indian Psychiatrists taking a vacation in London. There were quite a few constraints in the UK for immediate medical attention and I didn’t know if we can wait for long.

With a bit of influence from my friend, I managed to get a personal first hand time with the psychiatrist, though against the rules of the UK health services. I was ready to go to any extremes to help my Eva.

Breaking the rules was the easier part. The difficult part was that of convincing Eva to meet the doctor. Difficult? It was an impossible task. And sadly, it remained impossible.

‘So, you think I am mad?’, she asked. Not a question to start with.

‘Eva..’, I began.

‘I AM NOT CRAZY’, she shouted.

The next second, she sank to the floor screaming with tears. The mere sight of this got me emotional. I couldn’t take it even for a second. That was it. End of discussion. To hell with OCD..! There was nothing wrong with Eva, MY EVA. I told myself. She is just scared, scared like a little kid.

‘Why don’t you go and talk to the doc?’, my cousin asked.

‘Me..?’, I asked.

‘Yeah. You. At least you can know what can be done’, she said.

‘I think we should both go, you grasp the medical terms better’

‘You really think so?’, she asked.

‘Maybe your patients don’t. But, I really think so’, I joked trying to convince my cousin that I was ok.

With Eva having calmed down over the last few days, we assumed it wasn’t necessary for us to be with her. She was so normal that I even thought of turning down the visit to the doc. But I thought, ‘what am I gonna lose? Let me go and meet the doc it might help’





Part IX:

Eva had plans of collecting materials for her project that evening. So, she was going to be late and I didn’t have to make up false situations to meet the doctor. She was going to be alright, I knew. It was just a patience that we required right now. Hopefully, there were going to be better answers today.

My Eva was going to be alright, I knew for sure.

I had borrowed my friend’s car trying to avoid the crowed evening travel in the trains and buses. A turn away from my house was the Horwarth main road. The building to the right of the signal we were standing was the Trinity shopping centre.

‘Probably, we’ll get something for Eva at the Trinity’s on our way back’, I was talking to my cousin.

It would not have been more than five minutes when my phone sprang to life. It was Eva.

‘Eva..?’, I picked up the call.

‘Where are you?’, she asked in a very low voice, almost a whisper.

‘Eva?? I am not able to hear you. Can you speak up??’, I said.

‘No..! I can’t talk loud. He’ll find out I am here’, she said.

‘What..!??? Who..!???’

‘I am hiding from him’

‘Hiding??!! From whom..? Where are you!!!’, I shouted.

‘Can you come and get me Pete???’, she cried.

‘What are you talking about?? What’s happening Eva??’, I asked pulling my car out of traffic onto the road-side parking lane.

‘He is coming to hurt me..! I am scared..!’, she cried again.

‘Where are you Eva..? I am coming right away’, I said.

‘Trinity Shopping.. I am hiding from him behind the Matalan’s collections’

Trinity shopping..! I had just crossed the building.

‘I am just a few minutes away I am turning around..! I will come and get you..!’, I shouted.

‘Please Peter..! Save me..!’, she said over and over and over again.

I turned to look at my cousin. She hadn’t spoken but understood what was happening, she nodded in acknowledgement.

I took a wild turn giving the traffic rules a damn. There were bewildered onlookers with a few sc..r..ee…t..ch..es.. behind from the traffic I cut through.

‘Get on the third lane, it open’, said my cousin, I obeyed.

Neither of us spoke a work. My pulse was racing, heart pounding. I held the wheels tight to control my nervousness.

I didn’t know what happened for the next few seconds and my driving was frantic. All eyes were searching was a way to the Trinity shopping. And all my mind thought was about my Eva.

And all of a sudden, ‘WATCH OUT..!!!!’, shouted my cousin and I got to my senses in a flash of a second and got my brakes. The car came to a scintillating stop with blares of horns all around. I was held up amidst a long lane of vehicles at the signal just a minute away from the building.

‘What the crap..!’, I shouted and the phone rang again. It was Eva.

‘Eva darling, I am almost there, don’t be scared. I am almost there’, the words kept coming out.

‘I am so scared. I am gonna run home’, she said.

‘What?? No..! stay right there..!’, I shouted.

‘I am almost out of the building..! I am gonna run home. That’s the only safe place for me’, she cried aloud.

‘I am a minute away from the building, I am gonna get to you in a minute. Stay right there’, I begged.

‘I’ll take the wheel, you run through the traffic..! Go to her’, said my cousin.

I was out of the car in a fraction of a second and started to run.

‘I am running to you Eva, stay….’, I began.

Before I could complete my sentence, ‘I am out of the building, the entrance near the signal’, she said.

‘Thank God..! I am just a few seconds away. Stay there, I am coming’, I said and I saw Eva among the crowd near the signal, waiting for the pedestrian green.

I slowed down. ‘Oh, my God. Oh.. My.. God..’, I told myself and slowed down my pace. She was just there a few feet away from me.

My Eva was safe right just right in from of me.

And suddenly she shouted loud..! So loud..! So, So, Loud..!

‘HE IS HERE..! HE IS GONNA HURT ME..!!!!!’, and she started running through the crowd towards the pedestrian crossing. She ran frantically without even noticing the traffic coming right at her.

‘NOOOO!!!!!!’, I shouted. All I could do was to shout. I froze right there..! But everything happened in less than a second. It all happened before I could blink my eyes.

‘NO……..!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY MOTHER OF GOD….!!!!!!! NO……..!!!!!!!’






Part X:

Eight Months Later…

‘You are late Pete..! Come on..!’, my cousin rushed.

‘Yeah..! I know.. I know..!’, I hurried.

‘Hey, I have packed double roasted crushed cashews. It’s Evangeline’s favourite’

‘Ha ha..! J Thank you..!’, I said.

‘Convey my regards to her. Tell her I will come to meet her on Friday’, she said.

‘Will sure do..! Catch you later..!’, I ran to my bus to meet Evangeline. Eva. My Angel.

I was a bit late than usual. And all the others had gone in to the room. The visitors ward opened every day at half past seven and I was late by a few minutes.

‘I thought you wouldn’t come today’, the receptionist said.

‘I cannot miss Eva even for a day. I would have taken her home but you people wouldn’t allow me to’, I smiled.

‘Don’t worry. Very soon..!’, she said with a smile..

There she was. My Eva dressed as beautiful as ever in the bright white. She always looked like an angel.

‘Hey Angel..!’, I sat next to her, ‘sorry I am late today’

She kept looking at me.

‘Don’t worry..! I will take you home soon.. J’, I said.

She kept looking at me.

‘See what I have brought you..! J your favourite..!’, I said with enthusiasm.

She didn’t react but kept looking at me.

‘Won’t you smile at me today?’, I kept talking to the same blank look.

The doctor came over behind me and gently tapped my shoulders and nodded in understanding. I nodded back controlling the tears that were beginning to roll from the corner of my eyes.

It’s been eight months since it happened. Just outside the Trinity shopping signal.

She was hit by a car while running across the traffic and she was thrown against the other vehicle. She fell hard on her back. She didn’t even twitch. She didn’t even move.

For a second, everything seemed alright that day. I thought my Eva was safe. And the next second she was there soaked in blood, right in front of my eyes.

Everything had happened so quickly, in a blink of second. The doctors had fought hard to save life. And all they could save was her life. Only her life.

She was in a coma for more than a month. And now, she had her eyes open but still has not come out of the serious brain damage. The doctors have a doubt if she would ever will.

I don’t have a doubt at all. She definitely will be alright some day. I know that for sure. She definitely will.

‘She doesn’t even recognize you..! She doesn’t even know who you are..! Then why waste your time and life?’, I am being asked everyday.

All I do is smile and give them the same answer, ‘May be she doesn’t understand who I am. But I do. I.. still.. Do..’

She is my EVANGELINE.

My ANGEL.

My LIFE.

I wake up everyday praying to God that, some day show would be alright. And that someday, she would recognize me and she would smile at me, as beautiful as ever.





NB:
This fiction is dedicated to those with obsessive compulsive disorder (diagnosed or undiagnosed). One person in every 50 suffers from serious OCD. The symptoms are usually overlooked and lead to disastrous situations. Lets understand this disorder and help people with the symptoms.